They Think I'm a Loony

Yup, the OB's office that is. I had my 16w appointment yesterday and thankfully all is still fine - although how they know I am still unsure. I am still not used to the inner workings of the OB office and I find myself treating it like an RE. I had the first appointment of the day, 9am so thinking it was like an RE, I got there at 8am so that I would truly be first. It so doesn't work like here. You just show up when its your appointment and then they take you. So weird. I actually met with three professionals yesterday - all think I'm nuts.

The first was the NP who went over the upcoming anatomy scan (April 21) and what to expect. She told me it is quite long and that I should bring snacks as sometimes the baby doesn't move enough for them to see all the organs. She explained that the ultrasound will be done on one day and then I am to come back later in the week to get the results and see the dr. Ok, I don't love this idea, but I didn't say anything about it. She then continued on with the appointment - checking my blood pressure (high) and then asking if I had any questions. I explained that I wanted my cervix checked to make sure that it was long and closed. She looked at me like I was crazy. I explained my fears and why I had them, but she still would not agree to check without some symptoms.

The second was the OB Internist who I see because of my blood pressure and acid reflux disease. I continue to take my reflux meds and therefore I haven't experienced additional GI problems...yet (I am told they are to come). This will be a serious problem when it occurs as I am already on very high prescription strength medications. Oh well, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. We then talked about my blood pressure. I wore a 24 hr monitor a couple of weeks ago and the results were not great. Currently, my bp gets high during the work day, but does drop when I am at home. I asked for meds so that I don't have to worry about it, however she would rather wait. She explained that in pregnancy, our bp naturally drops between 20-24w pregnancy and she wants to wait to see what my body will do. I am to be monitored every two weeks though and adjustments to this plan may happen. She also said in passing that I should not get too comfortable at work - uh oh.

The third was the OB himself. He first spent a long time reorganizing my file (binder) and then meticulously read over the notes from the other two. He did not mention my cervix even though my concerns were written in his chart. He seems happy with my progress, however he did not use a Doppler or an ultrasound so how does he really know things are still ok? I know from my at home Doppler, but seriously? He then explained the anatomy scan to me in greater detail and told me that for me, I need to have both the scan and meeting with him on the same day. I like this better, but again didn't say anything. He wrote a long note in my file for the receptionist...I didn't understand at the time. When I went to book the appointments, the receptionist seemed puzzled. Apparently, at this clinic no one ever has their anatomy scan and dr appointment on the same day as it takes up too much time and screws up their entire day. Now I see that he really thinks I'm nuts and can't wait the extra two days in between. Fine by me.

Anyway, things continue to go well physically. Emotionally is another story. I had my appointment with SJ yesterday as well and she is starting to get concerned about the fact that I am not connecting with IT at all. She still is waiting until after the anatomy scan before really getting worried, but like her I am upset about it. I don't feel anything towards this - except fear. I still don't spend much time thinking about it, but I do find a reassurance in the Doppler although just knowing it is there is enough. I would love to hear stories from those of you who had similar trouble connecting and what helped.

-R.