A. and I had an appointment with SJ today. When we got there, she wasn't quite ready for us so we decided to run across the street and grab a quick drink. It is hot here so I was wearing a sundress that is a bit low cut, but still appropriate for day (I usually dress extremely modestly and showing even a bit of cleavage is too much for me) when crossing the stress I was accosted by a random woman who started yelling in the streets telling me to "put my tits away" and then started screaming about France and the burkah law. A. was seriously pissed and started to defend my honour, but the woman was not all there so I asked him to let it go. It was really weird.
On to the appointment...
It started off really well. A. and I both felt that we had made some great process and that we were both committed to this process. Phew. Then all hell broke loose. It was almost like a free for all where we started going back and forth and lots of stuff came up, but not in a good way. It was pretty intense. I was really upset and SJ could tell. By the end of the appointment I was just finished. I had no energy left. BUT, what was weird was that as soon as we left the office, it was back to business as usual. A. gave me a kiss goodbye and we went our separate ways (him back to work, me home). We talked on the phone during my drive home and I was able to articulate why I was so upset and I think he now gets it. I just wish he was hearing me before. Boys can be so frustrating sometimes. I know that we are far from fixed and we, like every couple will have our ups and downs, it just sucks sometimes. Things are ok between us and we are looking forward to the weekend and spending time together which is good. I am going to focus on that.
In other news, I think I may need to distance myself from my sister. We continue to spend a lot of time together and I feel that it is not good for me. She continues to be extremely sensitive to me, but every now and then I want to explode. I am still so hurt and upset and although I don't show it to her, I am broken on the inside. I don't think it's realistic to really distance myself, but I need to find a way to be ok with everything.