Hypnosis has been on my mind a lot lately. I am not sure that I am the hypnosis type (nor do I know who/what the type is), but either way, I don't think I'm it. I'll admit that I have been going out of my comfort zone lately and experiencing elements of eastern medicine like acupuncture, but when I think of hypnosis the idea of meditation comes to mind, and that doesn't work for me. I don't have anything against meditation, but it doesn't work on me. I try really hard to follow the voice and have them guide me in the room of hallways and then my mind goes at 1000 miles per second thinking about my cycle, life, work and anything else I can to distract myself from the CD.
Lately I have heard stories of failure that have got me thinking. There are so many couples that are trying to get pregnant and have that perfect cycle, but it resulted in a negative. So I ask myself, why should I think that donor egg will be my solution? This has been weighing heavily on my mind for weeks now. Each potential pregnancy is unique and the reasons for success or failure are not always known, however I do always seem to fall on the wrong side of the statistics each and every time. I need to get my head in the game. I need to think positively. Maybe hypnosis is the answer?
So as I am pretty confident that I have decided on trying the hypnosis route, I now must decided when, where and how. As I see it, I have two options:
1) there is a woman in Denver who pioneered hynofertility and she will "meet" with you over the phone and create a personalized recording
2) the woman in Denver has trained many professionals and there is one not too far from my house that I could meet in person
Which would you choose, the teacher or the student? Seeing as I go to one of the top clinics in North America and have the top doctor at said clinic, my first inclination is to choose option one, but then I think about the logistics and my comfort level and how it could be fantastic to meet someone in real life than always chatting over the phone or Internet. So again, I find myself torn. Why can't anything be simple? I am so sick of every little thing turning into a massive issue. I am tired of this.
I realize I need to take the plunge and continue putting myself out there, but it is difficult so please bare with me as I try to figure it all out.