Monday, February 1, 2010

I Need Your Advice...

Today I thought I would pose a scenario out to the blog world and hopefully get some advice from all of you!

This summer I am going to be a bridesmaid in my cousin’s wedding. The wedding is set for Sunday, August 1, 2010. All of the bridesmaids are going to wear the same dress and they need to be ordered on Wednesday (yes, you read correctly, this week). Here is where my dilemma comes in.

My cousin does not know (to my knowledge) of our trying to conceive and I would like to continue hide that fact. If all were to go according to plan (and we all know how plans work out) than I would be 4-5 months pregnant at this wedding. I don’t know what to do about my dress. I guess I have two options and I would really like your opinions as to what you would do in my situation.

1) I could order the dress in my size and if I need a bigger one, order a second dress and hope that I will be able to get it in time.
2) I could think positively as if there were going to work and order a bigger size.

As I see there are definitely pros and cons to both situations. I think I know what my decision will be, but it is definitely something to think about. I am yet again annoyed that my infertility is turning what should be a fun event (who doesn’t like shopping?) into a stressful disaster.



  1. Well, I can certainly understand the dilemma! It is so hard to plan ahead in the IF world, isn't it? What I'm wondering is...would it be easier to just order the larger size and then have it taken in if you end up not needing it? It seems it would be easier to take one in than to order another one at the last minute. And also, although I know you don't want to think about it, you could end up getting pushed out a bit on your calendar, for example if your donor had a cyst or something... so you can't be entirely sure of the size you would need. I think that going for the larger size would be the way to go! Let's see what other people have to say, but don't let this stress you out too much!

  2. I agree with Cassie, I would order a size or two bigger or see if you can return a dress if you need to and order one size with your cousin and see if you can get the ordering info and order another one in the bigger size too. That way she sees your 'normal size' being ordered and wont ask questions. In the end you would still have to return one, but then you dont have to explain to anyone except the customer service rep what you are up to.

  3. It's always easier to have something taken in because there is only so much fabric you can let out with a smaller dress. If you only want to order one dress, than I would order the next size up.

    That being said, I thought Sweet Pea had a great idea to order the one that "fits" now to avoid any questions your cousin may have and then order the bigger one on the sly without your cousin knowing. However, if these are custom made, you may not be able to return the one that doesn't fit??

    Okay - I know I am waffling but if I were you, I would order the next size up. At 4-5 months, you won't be showing too much. How's that for positive thinking?

  4. I would order the next size up! I know you don't want to jinx it - but odds are so good with DE that you'll be pregnant. And, as others have said, a lot easier to take things in than let things out.

  5. The advice seems pretty unanimous. Order one size up. If this were solely a logical decision, though, it is clear that you should order one size up. With DE your odds are great and you have a donor who is "pre-approved" so to speak. My only concern would be that in the remote chance that you are delayed or something, would it be an emotional issue to have the bigger size taken in? Or, if you prepare for that remote possibility, would it be okay knowing that it will happen soon for you.