Reflections on House Hunting

My baby brother (24 years old) bought a house with his girlfriend. They got possession today and I couldn't wait to go and see it. It is fantastic, and I am so happy for them. It has character, a lot of nice upgrades and is in a pretty great location. It's perfect for them. I am reminded of when A. and I bought our house. We were recently engaged and wanted to buy right away. We knew the area we wanted, but at first our eyes were bigger than our wallets. We looked at houses WAY out of our price range, not really knowing what our range was. We thought we needed a lot of space, like five bedrooms. Looking back, why did we think we needed such a large house? At the time, my father told us that we should consider a condo in the city, but I was against the idea. I wanted a house in the burbs. I am so regretting this decision right now.

I grew up in the suburbs and so I always dreamed about living there and raising my family. I pictured walking the streets with my stroller, going to the park and having street parties with the other families. Maybe, my fantasies aren't the most realistic, however they do seem to happen in my neighbourhood, only I am always watching from the inside of my house. I used to love walking in the summer, but now it is too painful. I am surrounded by Bugaboo strollers, new mother walking groups and toddlers on swings; I ache to be a part of this exclusive community.

The house we bought is amazing. We live in a quiet suburb in an area filled with young families. We have three bedrooms upstairs and we recently finished the basement and added another bedroom. We did this in anticipation of our last IVF cycle with my eggs working and needing the extra space. I am always convinced that with each IVF, I will become pregnant with twins. Not. even. close. But I keep hoping. Not necessarily for the twins, but for the pregnancy.

We finally have a chance of achieving this dream with our frozen embryos and I am just hoping and praying that it will work out.

-R.