That's right. I think the emotions and the hormones and the fear have turned me into a mega-bitch. Sorry A. (He doesn't read this blog, but he checks it sometimes, so I figure I'll put the apology out there and hopefully he will know.)
Tomorrow I am going to speak with my CCRM nurse and my local RE regarding next steps. I am now in unchartered territory and I don't really have a plan (which is so not like me). My nurse told me I need to get an OB, ok, how do you do that? I've never been pregnant and my family doctor does my yearly checks so I've never had to see one before. Also, can I go to any doctor, or do they have special doctors for IVF patients, or lunatics like I may turn out to be. I have always considered myself a pretty level headed person, but I feel the need to protect myself and this pregnancy so I may turn into one of those patients they make fun of.
What's the difference between a highrisk and a regular OB anyway? Does it really make a difference?
***
On another note, my sister finally told my family last night her news. She waited until I heard my results so I was still first to announce. My parents are literally in shock. My brother cried (but told my sister as happy as is he is for her, the tears were for me...he is so sweet). My dad is really concerned about me. He wishes there was a way for us both to tell our extended families together (there isn't because she is already 10 weeks, and I will wait until I am 12 weeks) as he feels my grandparents are going to be devastated for me. It is true, they will be. That will be hard for me. It will suck actually, but I will have to keep telling myself that soon will be my turn. (Please remind me of this on Father's Day when she makes her big announcements and everyone there gives me the sad, pathetic, I'm so sorry for you eyes.) Otherwise, it was pretty awesome for both of us to share such news on the same day. Yes, there will be times (like Father's Day) where it will hurt and sting and suck that she is farther along than me, but then there are the other days where we can shop together, talk about our bodies changing and our symptoms and just be two best friends and sisters going through pregnancy together. I guess I will just have to remind myself of the positives from time to time.
New Symptoms: nauseous when brushing teeth, acne on chin and bitchy.
-R.
oh, R, im so sorry that you don't feel like you can tell everyone yet. could you maybe tell your grandparents so that they don't feel so bad? i understand the idea behind not telling everyone, i did it myself. the next time im pregnant though, i have decided that we will share our good news early. if the same thing happens to us again, i want my baby to have had as much love and concern on this earth as is possible. i waited until 12 weeks to tell most people, but family we told right away.
ReplyDeletei don't want you to think that means i don't respect your decision, just another way to look at things.
aren't you glad to be making these decisions?
and i understand the bitchiness and the unease. it's so hard to feel comfortable, especially in these early days. im sure after your u/s you will feel much better. if you have twins, i would insist that you see a high risk OB. YES THERE IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE. i wish i had.
i don't live in CA, so i can't help you decide how to get one though, sorry.
umm, what else did i want to say?
oh, i read on someone's blog when i was pregnant...i have no idea who, but this always stuck with me. she said "every day i am pregnant is a good day." i tried to live that quote throughout my pregnancy, and you know what? she was right, even the bitchy days were wonderful. congratulations.
xoxo
sorry the above should read "aren't you glad to finally be making these decisions? :)"
ReplyDeletei was typing too fast and my tone came across a bit wrong! xoxo
Hey R...ah what a beautiful story about your brother and your family. But talk about a rock and a hard place about your sister's announcement at Father's Day and your family hoping you would be the first with the news...
ReplyDeleteI strongly think you should tell JUST your family on the same date that your sister tells them. It will be agonizing for them if they don't get news from you first. Having gone through two miscarriages, I'm not at all saying that you will m/c, but if you do then you will need all of your families support. But draw the line at the extended family and ask them to please please keep this quiet for a few more weeks. I agree with your dad on this one...
Just my opinion...
And the OB...I think IVF pg's should be considered "high risk" from the start...especially the first trimester. And if it is twins the referral should be fast tracked. Just have your family doc make a referral to an OB ASAP. Nothing wrong with it...
LisainSK
P.S. and don't worry about the bitchiness...pregnancy won't be all rosey and though I can imagine you'll be grining ear to ear when you get those first nausea waves...in a few weeks you'll be counting down the days until the nausea is gone. You fought tooth and nail to get pg but it's hard to feel happy when you feel physically miserable. Be kind to yourself and let you be how you want to be...
I tried to get referred into several high risk practices but they basically laughed at me and said that I wasn't high risk simply because I was having twins. I was told that since twins are more common these days, they don't consider it high risk anymore. What I then did was to choose a doctor that had a high risk practice but I was then referred into their low risk practice. That way, if I suddenly developed complications, I could be referred into their high risk practice. I think what they do is basically the same though in terms of the number of appointments and the monitoring that you receive (i.e. doctor's visits, ultrasounds, bloodwork). If you do end up having twins, I would highly, highly recommend Mt. Sinai and getting into the practice of Dr. Farine, Dr. Ritchie and Dr. Seaward (they operate together). These doctors are all high risk pregnancy gurus and they have a high risk clinic; however, they also run regular pregnancy programs which was what I was a part of. Dr. Seaward was my OB but the doctor who delivered my girls was Dr. Sermer. Dr. Seaward is the head of obstetrics at Mt. Sinai and very nice with years and years of experience. It's a pain to go downtown for your appointments, but it was so worth it for the medical expertise. Dr. Sermer was also very nice and had a great bedside manner. Good luck finding an OB and you can always check out www.ratemds.com to see what everyone else had to say.
ReplyDelete(I think we live in the same city no? If not, disregard doctor recommendations...)
ReplyDeleteI too find myself having less patience with people and feeling very bitchy. I think it's probably normal as the hormones increase. Too sweet about your brother!
ReplyDeleteYou have to do what you feel most comfortable with regarding your family announcements.... Maybe after your first u/s you'll feel different about telling (we didn't, but some people do :).
Checking in to see how it all turned out and I am so thrilled to see the great news. Congratulations! Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months.
ReplyDeleteHigh risk OB usually deals with twins and up. But if you're pregnant with a singleton, then you can see a regular one. You should have your first u/s around 6.5 weeks.