Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Coffee and Movie Dates

Thank you all for your advice, it was great to see such different perspectives. To tell the truth, I wasn't sure what I was going to do today up until it happened.

We met for coffee (of course I opted for the ever popular red raspberry leaf tea ;)) and it didn't take her long to jump right in ask, "where are you at?". I told the truth. It just slipped out. Before I could even take it back, she gave a look like she knew already. She also is doing the donor route. She tried once and failed (poor egg quality of the donor, ugh!) and is now in the 2ww of a second donor cycle.

I'll admit, on the one hand it will be really nice to know someone in my city who is going through exactly what I am, but I am also pissed off. Why reach out to me when you are inches away from getting pregnant? I really can't stomach the idea of another person succeeding before me (you all don't count). I know that sounds awful, but really, after three years, I feel like I have done my time and now I'm ready. It would be awesome if we both were pregnant, but is that realistic? Not in my world.


Tonight was another movie date with grandma and the girls. After I suggested the movie, "My Sister's Keeper" (aka the biggest tear jerker ever), I have been banned from choosing the movie. Tonight we saw, "The Back-Up Plan" (aka an infertile's nightmare). It did have some funny parts and some important lessons about getting pregnant. Here is what I learned from the movie: (MOVIE SPOILER ALERT, DON"T READ IF INTERESTED IN WATCHING THE MOVIE)

1. Immediately following an IUI, place legs in the air for 10 minutes (don't worry the dr will set a timer)
2. While in the 2ww it is important to do the following: drink wine, lift weights over 8 pounds, use the elliptical machine
3. Before the first ultra sound, make sure to have sex
4. Don't worry about frozen sperm not being so great, they will most likely produce more than optimal results
5. When you're least expecting it, a pregnancy will arrive

Needless to say, it was not so educational, and quite upsetting with how getting pregnant was romanticized. I just wish for once, a movie would tell it like it is. Yes, IUI and other more invasive procedures work, but those going through the treatment feel the heartache and the anxiety and the pain.



  1. *LOL i can't believe you saw that movie. but im glad it was entertaining, if nothing else...

    *did you read the book My Sisster's Keeper? i was a little disappointed that they changed the ending in the movie, but all around i thought it was a great depiction.

    *you are not a shrew (sorry im late on that one)

    *i figured the truth would come out and i know how you feel about others. im at the point where i really dont want to hear another pregnancy announcement, stopped going to baby showers long ago and am dreading an impending announcement of my best friend, whose daughter will be 1 next weekend. she isnt even trying but, well, she wasn't trying the first time either. oh, and she didn;t tell me for four months.

    im exhausted, hence the bullet points...i am actually planning on writing a post about this because i never see IF movies that depict the real IF. did you see Baby Mama? nuff said.

    but Couple's Retreat was a good one. one of the couples had been trying for a long time and they were deciding if their relationship could survive any longer. when i saw that i figured they would be waving around a BFP by the end, but they weren't and it was handled well as a sub-plot.

    sorry to hijack your commments and thanks for the well wishes...shots tomorrow!

  2. Can I just say how tired I am of seeing movies depict pg that way? Of course 'our way' would probably make the most depressing movie ever!

    Oh, and if I hear of one more person getting pg IRL (at least before me :) - I might throw up, or at least throw something....

  3. Don't you even worry about not wanting anyone else to get pregnant before you do! WE ALL FEEL THAT WAY! IF freaking sucks. I am still amazed by the people who actually get to have sex with their husbands to create a baby...really? it really works that way?
    Haven't seen Back Up Plan but saw previews and thought it looked incredibly dangerous for me to see. I did see Juno and cried through every scene with Jennifer Garner. Her pain was real to me in that movie, I don't think I could feel that way about J Lo.
    Hang in there ~ your time is coming!!

  4. I'm sad that you can't be happy for someone who has gone through IF and DE. I wish you peace.