Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Untitled...

I can't think of a title for this post. It was supposed to be a post about my lining. An uplifting post because it increased to 6.5 and so I am able to stay on the same protocol and continue building it and get rechecked on Friday. I am not out of the woods yet, but hopefully on an upward tilt. Friday will be D-Day though, its my last chance. I am worried, but I am going to try and focus my energy on getting acupuncture treatments and staying calm. (How long do you think that will last?)

I thought about writing about todays, "The Doctor" show where my doctor was a guest. I'll admit was a kick seeing him on TV, but I thought the segment as a whole was too happy. Just my opinion though.

I wanted to write about my session with SJ and how she said, I was looking a lot calmer than she was anticipating. How I attribute this to my hypnosis cd that I listen to every night while falling asleep. How when she asked me if I had any more pregnancy announcements I had none. I left her office, feeling pretty good.

So good in fact, that I spoke with A. and we came up with a straetgy plan for what I need emotionally if things should fall apart.

I just didn't realize that things would fall apart so quickly.

In the car on my way home from SJ, I got a message from a friend asking me to call her. You know where I am going with this. Pregnancy announcement #1. She was extremely sensitive and I wished her well, hung up the phone and cried myself home. A. saw my hysterical state, and thought it would be better for me to be upset once, then on multiple days so you guessed it, pregnancy announcement #2. This is from a couple who is now expecting their third. When this couple told us about their second child, it was after we had been "out" about our infertility, when I was still able to joke. I think I even made a comment about the rule that no one gets seconds before everyone has firsts. Needless to say, more hysterical crying and no joking. The kicker came about 5 minutes later, with pregnancy announcemnt #3. I think my exact words were, "just kill me now". This couple has stuggled for a long time to conceive. She has Lupus and they have undergone 3 IVFs, I am happy for them.

Could this day suck anymore?

-R.

11 comments:

  1. I'm practically speechless (commentless?). That is awful to have to hear those announcements right now...I'm sorry.

    BUT, to focus on the positive--I'm so happy your lining is moving in the right direction! Go lining go!!!

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  2. Oh sweets, I'm so sorry about all those announcements - especially all at once!

    Happy to hear the news about your lining though, that's great! I'll keep sending grow lining vibes your way.... (((HUGS)))

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  3. The worst is getting lapped. I am so sorry that you had all these blows in one day. However, I am so very happy that your lining increased!!!

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  4. Oh my heart breaks for you... three annoucements in one day?! I am so sorry. And for it being a third pregnancy... that just makes it sting a little bit more. Wish I had the magic wand to make all of the pain go away.

    On a bright note, So happy to hear your lining is moving in the right direction! Will be thinking of you as you wait for the final lining check.

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  5. Seriously, 3??? What are the frickin' chances. That is just horrible timing. Ugh, I am so very sorry that you had such a crappy day:(

    Praying hard that your lining will be nice and thick come Friday. Thinking of you and wishing you the best! ((HUGS))

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  6. Have you talked to your Acupuncturist about any points to help with your lining? Or could there be any kind of nutritional regimen you could do? Just kind of thinking and typing at the same time....I am somewhat of a health nut so my mind automatically goes to nutrition with topics like this. I wonder if there is any sort of link to a certain vitamin deficency and lining? My mom had 2 m/c and her doctor told her (this was 35 yrs ago) to eat the pith of an orange to stregthen her lining. I drank one ounce of wheat grass a day during both of my cycles, supposedly that helps with your lining too. Just trying to throw some things out there ~ I know you have to be so frustrated and for that I am deeply sorry for you. I hope things start looking up soon. Hugs to you.

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  7. Yes, Reesa, it could suck more. You could be sick or dying of cancer or have a close family or friend going through that. Try to put things in perspective - I know the pg announcements hurt you particularly hard, but try to keep focusing on the positive, including that your lining is growing.

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  8. I'm so sorry you got stuck with all those announcements at this super-stressful time. It is never fun to hear them, but especially not now. And as for the comment above, yes, of course it could suck more, but it is hard to think in those terms when we are in the midst of this experience. Of course we all realize that having cancer or some other terminal disease would suck way more, but that does not lessen the pain that we are going through as we struggle to be able to hold our own baby in our arms. It is its own kind of pain.

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  9. I hate Anonymous commenters. It took me almost 3 years but I finally decided to disabled them. Bah!

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  10. Don't you hate when someone totally minimizes your feelings? And does it anonymously? Grrrrr.

    3 announcements in one day is a lot. Too much. I'm sorry you had to go through that. ((((hugs))))

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  11. Hi Reesa,

    Ah jeez, three announcements in one day?!! Seriously, that's rough.

    Great to hear your lining is improving. Also thanks for the heads up on Dr. Famous on the Doctors yesterday. SUper cool to see him on TV and to know we get to speak with him on Monday. Hang in there gal...you're stronger than you think. Here's hoping today's a much better day than today.

    LisainSK

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